Peace of Soul

Right now I'm reading a book by Archbishop Fulton J Sheen called, "Peace of Soul".  I'm only on page 69 and I'm already astonished by the depth and beauty of this book.   The chapter title that I've gone through so far are: Frustration, The Philosophy of Anxiety, The Origin of Conflicts and Their Redemption and Is God Hard to Find? And the chapter I'm just starting is called Morbidity and the Denial of Guilt. 
So far the Archbishop has walked through topics on man's desire for happiness, and happiness in God, the revolt of our flesh, and how God is not hiding from us. I can't wait to finish the book and be able to post more about it, I'm just really excited about it.

Peace of Soul is one of those books on God that tells you mostly things you already knew, but it presents it in such a new light, that you can't help but feel you've learned something new.  It's basically just a book on the Good News, but that is why it's so exciting.  What could be more exciting than God's Good News?

I also have a prayer request. This weekend I am going on a retreat, please pray for myself and all those who are going on it, and those leading it, that the Lord will work profound miracles.

God bless!

Lauds Reading & Responsory

Isaiah 1: 16-18

Wash yourselves clean!
Put away your misdeeds from before my eyes;
cease doing evil; learn to do good.
Make justice your aim; redress the wronged,
hear the orphan's plea, defend the widow.
Come now, let us set things right,
says the Lord:
Though your sins be like scarlet,
they may become white as snow;
Though they be crimson red,
they may become white as wool.


Responsory:

God himself will set me free, from the hunter's snare.
-God himself will set me free, from the hunter's snare.

From those who would trap me with lying words
-and from the hunter's snare.

Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit
-God himself will set me free, from the hunter's snare.

The L Word part 1

What does it mean to be in love with God? What is love?  When I said at the beginning of Lent that I wanted to fall in love again, did I realize the statement I was making?  These are questions I have been musing over for a couple of days.
I think I'll take the answers slowly.

First of all I think the answer to the third question: When I said at the beginning of Lent that I wanted to fall in love again, did I realize the statement I was making?  is yes and no.  People who know me, know that I've encountered the love of God in a powerful way.  For those that don't know...Well the short version is I was lost and then I was found.  The summer of 2010 I fell in love with God for the first time. Since then it's been a journey, with good times and bad times. Which is why I wanted to make the commitment to love again.  Again I can't remember the exact Bible verse, but it says something about remembering your first love.  And that's what I want to do.  Go back to my first love, and go deeper.
One of the missionaries was giving an example of the love of God, and our love for him. She talked about God's love (and our love for him) being like a mighty river.  And first you just dip your toes in His river. Then he calls you out a little deeper, and then a little deeper. Each time we go deeper, we learn something new, something more, something deeper about Him.

I think the first and second question go to together: What is love?  In the world today hear all about love.  Love is fuzzy feelings, butterflies, sex, pleasure, the want of someone.  But what is true love?  Catholic and Christians tell us that love is sacrificing what I want for what someone else wants.  Okay, well that makes sense for people. But how does this apply to me and God?  As I sat thinking about this it hit that the answer is really scary.
Giving up what I want for what God wants. If I really mean that I want to love God in that way, that means I have to be willing to change everything for Him.  Everything that I want, everything I would like to do. The college I want to go to, the person I want to marry, everything.

This brings me to the second question: What does it mean to be in love with God?
There's another great song that I love that talks about this like climbing a mountain with hands wide open.
Isaiah 2:3 talks about climbing the Lord's mountain, to receive teaching from the Lord.  And if we think about climbing a mountain, you need your hands!  In this song we have a striking image of not using our hands to climb the mountain.  Our relationship with God is complex.  On one hand we have to climb the mountain ourselves, because of free will God will not force us.  And then on the other hand we have to let God be in control of our climbing, He must help our hands.
This is true love of God, that in serving and worshiping Him we let him guide us.  And the only way to do this is through constant prayer.

I would like to continue to talk about these questions, and the answers, throughout Lent.  As always I pray for you, as I hope you pray for me.

To Be Continued.

Lauds Reading for March 13

1st Kings 8:51-53a

We are your people and your inheritance. Thus may your eyes be open to the petition of your servant and to the petition of your people Israel. Hear us whenever we call upon you, because you have set us apart among all the peoples of the earth for your inheritance. 

The Real Meaning of Lent

I think I am a like to almost all Catholics kids when it comes to Lent.  Growing up I practically hated Lent. I mean, what's fun about having to stop eating chocolate for 40 days? Or not getting to watch movies during the week?
Growing up I missed the point of Lent, and it's just now really hitting me.   In our morning prayers this week my dad said something to the effect of: "Lent is a time to clean up the clutter in your soul."  That blew my mind.  Maybe it was the way it was worded, or maybe I haven't really been listening at mass till now, but...Wow.  That is what Lent is supposed to be.

Focusing on this new definition all we have to do is rethink our past ideas of Lent, and we...I begin to realize that Lent should really be one of the best times of the year.
All the fasting, the ashes, the long holy week, all of this has a point!   St. Ambrose says that "All men are slaves to sin."   Just looking at my life day to day I can see where I have sinned in thought, word and deed. Each day we sin!  It's no wonder that God chose to have a special season in our Church to help us get right with them.


Praying that you all have an amazing lent.

This Lent I'm Falling in LOVE Again

Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.  These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts.  Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.  Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.  Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.


This has always been one of my favorite passages in the old testament, and I'm not sure if I can put it into words why.
There is obvious joy in the writer's heart. The one who wrote this was excited.
"Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up."   Don't stop talking about Him!
I'm a fan of quite a few British TV shows, I have no problem talking about one or the other, whenever. Sure some people think I'm obsessed and really geeky, but I don't care. I like the TV show. 
Am I the same when I talk/think about my saviour?

Wednesday started the season of Lent in the Catholic Church.   For about a week before my family and I spent time trying to decide what to give up for Lent.  And although I do have things I am giving up, I think this Lent, for me, is going to be a time of my obsession with God.
There is a psalm, what number it is I can't remember, but it says "He is my love, my fortress."
He is my love.

One of my favorite songs is by United Pursuit and it's called "Help Me Find My Own Flame."
I love this song because it's about taking the love of God for our own, and not letting it be "dry bones."

This Lent I'm falling in love again.  Please pray for me as I do so.

This is a long post I know, but I want to leave you with the link to the song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShlmvA4-bgM 

Intercessions from the Liturgy of the Hours

Let us adore Christ who offered himself to the Father through the Holy Spirit to cleanse us from the works of death. Let us adore him and call upon him with sincere hearts.
In your will is our peace, Lord. 

From your generosity we have received the beginning of this day,
-grant us also the beginning of new life
In your will is our peace, Lord.

You created all things, and now you provide for their growth,
-may we always perceive your handiwork in creation.
In your will is our peace, Lord.

With your own blood, you ratified the new and eternal covenant,
-may we remain faithful to that covenant by following your precepts
In your will is our peace, Lord.

On the cross, blood and water flowed from your side,
-may this saving stream wash away our sings and gladden the City of God
In your will is our peace, Lord.

All-powerful Father,
as now we bring you our songs of praise,
so may we sing your goodness
in the company of your saints for ever.
We ask this through Christ our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son,
who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit,
one God forever and ever. Amen

Week One: Mexico Mission!

The first week of Mexico has been so blessed.  We had a short term trip with us.  And what I great way to start out the mission! With a renewing of fire and love for Evangelization and the poor.  
During one of my daily prayer times I asked the Lord to give me a verse for my year of missions.  He gave me Psalm 27.   This Psalm is beautiful and speaks to me of no matter what trials come my way, each day I will live for God’s Kingdom.

The Lord is my light and my salvation—

   whom shall I fear?

The Lord is the stronghold of my life—

   of whom shall I be afraid?

When the wicked advance against me

   to devour me,

it is my enemies and my foes

   who will stumble and fall.

Though an army besiege me,

   my heart will not fear;

though war break out against me,

   even then I will be confident.

One thing I ask from the Lord,

   this only do I seek:

that I may dwell in the house of the Lord

   all the days of my life,

to gaze on the beauty of the Lord

   and to seek him in his temple.

For in the day of trouble

   he will keep me safe in his dwelling;

he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent

   and set me high upon a rock.

Then my head will be exalted

   above the enemies who surround me;

at his sacred tent I will sacrifice with shouts of joy;

   I will sing and make music to the Lord.

Hear my voice when I call, Lord;

   be merciful to me and answer me.

My heart says of you, “Seek his face!”

   Your face, Lord, I will seek.

Do not hide your face from me,

   do not turn your servant away in anger;

   you have been my helper.

Do not reject me or forsake me,

   God my Savior.

Though my father and mother forsake me,

   the Lord will receive me.

Teach me your way, Lord;

   lead me in a straight path

   because of my oppressors.

Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,

   for false witnesses rise up against me,

   spouting malicious accusations.

I remain confident of this:

   I will see the goodness of the Lord

   in the land of the living.

Wait for the Lord;

   be strong and take heart

   and wait for the Lord.

I'm Just Like Them

              I have this fear of letting God take complete control in my life.  It's as if I think He's the big bad guy in the sky, waiting for me to screw up so He can rain down punishment.  As if He's going to trick me into doing something I don't want to do. Seriously?

I have this fear that is completely unfounded. God has only good plans for my future. And I know this because of all He's done in the past. This summer I've been on two amazing mission trips. This fall I have my missionary training.  I have a wonderful family that inspires me to grow closer to God.  I am surrounded by missionaries who give of themselves to the fullest extent.  I turned my back on the Divine Lover, but he never stopped wooing me.  How's that for blessed? Who am I to fear?
In the book of Exodus, right after God leads his people through the Red Sea, we read that they start to grumble and complain and worry.

"Would that we had died by the hand of the Lord in the land of Egypt, when we sat by the fleshpots and ate bread to the full; for you have brought us out of into this wilderness to kill this whole assembly with hunger." (Exodus 16:3)

God has just done mighty deeds for them! He split the Red Sea and wiped out Pharaohs' army. And the Israelites are worried about something as trivial as food?  The God who created the earth, who created them, who led them out of Egypt with signs and wonders is not going to forget about food.

        I guess I've always kinda known this but it really hit me today.  I'm just like them.  I sit back after I see God do miracles and say, "Um God I don't trust you with my future."   Wow.  He's shown me in so many ways that He loves me.  And yet I still fear.  God forgive me!   I'm just like them. I can make excuses:
"If I don't know what God's will is then I'm going to mess up and I'll ruin my entire life." 
"God may have done miracles for others but He doesn't do them for me." 

On and on.   Stop.  Think. Are any of those excuses true? No. Okay? Okay.


To wrap up my ramblings I have to say that I don't have a brilliant answer or solution to this problem.  But I'm gonna bet He does.   And I'll just go with that and pray, and ask others to pray as well, that I would learn how to completely trust God.

God is Good

God is amazingly good to me! The past few weeks have been crazy.  My family has been away from the Philippines for almost three months now, we traveled from the Philippines to our home state of Oregon. There I graduated from High School and traveled back down to Big Woods.  From Big Woods I flew to Ecuador where I spent two weeks helping to lead a mission trip.  It was so amazing! My second favorite country is now Ecuador.  I fell in love with the people, and the beautiful jungle. It was so good to be back in missions serving and preaching.  I will be leading another trip in July.   

Another wonderful thing that happened was I got accepted to this years Intake! 

Every year starting in September, Family Missions Company (FMC) trains new missionaries to go out to the world.  I will be apart of that this year.  I ask for everyone to please please pray for me. That I would have an open heart and mind to be taught. And that God would just shower graces upon me and those joining me in this blessed work. Also pray that I get enough money to pay the training fees. 

I hope and pray that God shows how good he is to you this week!

Typhoon Days

I've been going over what happened in my mind, but I still have not come to a ''post worthy'' conclusion.  So I'll just say a little something. On Tuesday the typhoon hit us, kicked off our electricity and left us without water, but besides that we were good. Our new but good friends Kring and Ramon and their two kids came over. We played games, played the guitar and read as the wind and rain battered outside. By that night we had 21 other people in our house.  That made a total of 32 people in our four bedroom house. All I can say is I was so incredibly blessed to share our house, our beds and food with these wonderful people. 
Abi

We are called to Love

For the past two days I have been reading this book called The Irresistible Revolution.  And then this morning in our Liturgy of the hours we read Romans 12:13-21.  It's something that I've read many many many times before, and it's always been like:
"Yeah, it's a nice reading." And then I forget about it.      But today, it spoke to me an a whole new level. Here's what it says.

 Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality.  Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.  Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.  Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody.  If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord.  On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head."  Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

And this reading struck me because this is what we are called to do. Share with those in need. Live in harmony with one another.  It's so easy, and I am guilty of this myself, to simply believe it's just something to read and then forget.  But Paul wrote this to the Romans, telling them this is the way they had to live.   If they had to live it? Why don't we?   

I lived in the ghetto of St. Lucia, where people were murdered across the street and we heard the gunshots.  I've lived in the dirt, in the trash, with people who could be called "unloveable''.  It wasn't fun for me, it wasn't easy.   It's easy to want to go back to the states, get married live a ''good Christian life'', raise ''good Christian kids.''   How do I do what I know I'm supposed to do?   The only answer I can come up with, and one I find echoed in The Irresistible Revolution, is to love.

If you love someone you're willing to do anything for them.  I have to love God in order to love that Romans verse.

My human love is not strong enough for that.  I pray that God gives me more of His love.

Let the insanity begin!

This week starts work week, which is when all the staff for Faith Camp get together to make Faith Camp happen.  We paint murals, get the games ready, and the coordinates get the plan for the next week all shiny. :D Please pray for me, and for all on staff this week that we would prepare our hearts to be the leaders God's want.

God Bless!

Faith Camp 2012

Its almost that time of year again, Faith Camp time!   For those of you who don't know Faith Camp is a summer camp put on by FMC.  Here is a link: http://bestweekofyourlife.com/Best_Week_Of_Your_Life/Home.html
Here is my story waaay back from 2010 http://veritasspelndor.blogspot.com/2010/07/my-story.html 
Faith Camp changed my life and this year I get a chance to serve the kids who are going there.  I am signed up to be a Cabin Leader.  I am a little nervous about this, because I'm not an outgoing person, and I will have to start cabin time discussions and other such things.  But I know that with God's help I will be the leader He is calling me to be.
So yup, this is going to be the next two weeks of my life.


God Bless,
Abi

Soul Prayer

God our Savior,
Hear our morning prayer:
Help us to follow the light
And live in the truth.
In YOU we have been born again
as sons and daughters of light:
may we be your witnesses before ALL the world.


This prayers was in our daily Liturgy of the Hours and I wanted to share it. :)

Me

Who I want to be:

Daughter of god. 

Servant of the Poor

Midwife

Sister

Helper

Friend

Daughter to my parents 

Lover

Guide 

I've been thinking about this a lot,  as you can tell from the posts lately. And I was thinking about how often I fail in my duties, how often I fail to be all I want to be, and God has called me to be.   I want this list to be written on my heart, something that I wake up in the morning in my mind, and something that I go to sleep remembering how I succeeded and failed and how I will do better the next day. 

Never forget who you are and who God as made you. He has wonderful plans in store for those who follow him. 

Remember Who made you, and who loves you. 

Blessings to you all my wonderful followers. 

Life

For every man there is a purpose which he sets up for his life and which he pursues. Let yours be the doing of all good deeds.

~Qu'ran

Stateside Mission

A week ago today my father, and three of my siblings, and I came back from Joplin MO. We went there to lead a work mission trip.  Six students from New York came down to help work on some projects. I wasn't very excited about going on this trip, I would have much rather stay at home with the rest of my family. But God did amazing things on that trip.  Every night I went to bed sore and aching, and every morning I woke with renewed strength. I made some wonderful friends, and watched the group turn into MISSIONARIES.  Its amazing how close people become when working selflessly side by side for the furthering of the Kingdom.   Being back on the mission field changed my heart. It's amazing how much God has to do that for us. And yet He never stops.
I'm very excited to go on more mission trips this year. :)

God Bless!
Abi

God likes little people.

This week God has really been teaching me that he loves little people, and he cares about little things in our lives.  One night our cord for our laptop stopped working, we would plug it in but it wouldn't charge. Needless to say we were all upset, the thought of having to get a new cord was in our minds. Suddenly Peter, (age 12) says, "Hey guys let's pray over the cord."  All of the little kids agreed and soon all ten of us are laying  hands on the cord.  My sister Ellie, simply asks God to heal our cord, we plug it in and it works.  All of us began to praise the Lord.  A cord is such a little thing, but God answered our prayers.
All of us have dreams of being something big, a famous novelist, a singer.  God wants us to be the best we can, but he also loves us as the little people we are.  A 16 year old, sister, daughter, and missionary. I am nobody to most of the people in the world. But I am someone in God's eyes. To him I'm His daughter, His lover, His little missionary.
I'm so thankful for God's love and mercy!

Blessings this Sunday,
Abi

Savior

This is part of a great song that I stumbled upon a couple days ago by LIGHTS.  I just wanted to post some of it and have people think about it.  God's love blows my mind, I hope it blows your mind to. :) 

The night is deafening
when the silence is listening
and I'm down on my knees 
and I know that something is missing 
because the back of my mind is holding things I'm relying in 
but I choose to ignore it because I'm always denying them 

I'm a bit of a manic when it's not as I plan it 
'cause I start losing my head then I get up in a panic
Remember, when we were kids and always knew when to quit it 
Are we denying a crisis or are we scared of admitting it?

I don't want to know

I just wanna run to you
and break off the chains
and throw them away
I just wanna be so much
and shake off the dust 
that turn me to rust
Sooner than later, I'll need a saviour
I need a saviour 

Abi