Peace of Soul

Right now I'm reading a book by Archbishop Fulton J Sheen called, "Peace of Soul".  I'm only on page 69 and I'm already astonished by the depth and beauty of this book.   The chapter title that I've gone through so far are: Frustration, The Philosophy of Anxiety, The Origin of Conflicts and Their Redemption and Is God Hard to Find? And the chapter I'm just starting is called Morbidity and the Denial of Guilt. 
So far the Archbishop has walked through topics on man's desire for happiness, and happiness in God, the revolt of our flesh, and how God is not hiding from us. I can't wait to finish the book and be able to post more about it, I'm just really excited about it.

Peace of Soul is one of those books on God that tells you mostly things you already knew, but it presents it in such a new light, that you can't help but feel you've learned something new.  It's basically just a book on the Good News, but that is why it's so exciting.  What could be more exciting than God's Good News?

I also have a prayer request. This weekend I am going on a retreat, please pray for myself and all those who are going on it, and those leading it, that the Lord will work profound miracles.

God bless!

Lauds Reading & Responsory

Isaiah 1: 16-18

Wash yourselves clean!
Put away your misdeeds from before my eyes;
cease doing evil; learn to do good.
Make justice your aim; redress the wronged,
hear the orphan's plea, defend the widow.
Come now, let us set things right,
says the Lord:
Though your sins be like scarlet,
they may become white as snow;
Though they be crimson red,
they may become white as wool.


Responsory:

God himself will set me free, from the hunter's snare.
-God himself will set me free, from the hunter's snare.

From those who would trap me with lying words
-and from the hunter's snare.

Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit
-God himself will set me free, from the hunter's snare.

The L Word part 1

What does it mean to be in love with God? What is love?  When I said at the beginning of Lent that I wanted to fall in love again, did I realize the statement I was making?  These are questions I have been musing over for a couple of days.
I think I'll take the answers slowly.

First of all I think the answer to the third question: When I said at the beginning of Lent that I wanted to fall in love again, did I realize the statement I was making?  is yes and no.  People who know me, know that I've encountered the love of God in a powerful way.  For those that don't know...Well the short version is I was lost and then I was found.  The summer of 2010 I fell in love with God for the first time. Since then it's been a journey, with good times and bad times. Which is why I wanted to make the commitment to love again.  Again I can't remember the exact Bible verse, but it says something about remembering your first love.  And that's what I want to do.  Go back to my first love, and go deeper.
One of the missionaries was giving an example of the love of God, and our love for him. She talked about God's love (and our love for him) being like a mighty river.  And first you just dip your toes in His river. Then he calls you out a little deeper, and then a little deeper. Each time we go deeper, we learn something new, something more, something deeper about Him.

I think the first and second question go to together: What is love?  In the world today hear all about love.  Love is fuzzy feelings, butterflies, sex, pleasure, the want of someone.  But what is true love?  Catholic and Christians tell us that love is sacrificing what I want for what someone else wants.  Okay, well that makes sense for people. But how does this apply to me and God?  As I sat thinking about this it hit that the answer is really scary.
Giving up what I want for what God wants. If I really mean that I want to love God in that way, that means I have to be willing to change everything for Him.  Everything that I want, everything I would like to do. The college I want to go to, the person I want to marry, everything.

This brings me to the second question: What does it mean to be in love with God?
There's another great song that I love that talks about this like climbing a mountain with hands wide open.
Isaiah 2:3 talks about climbing the Lord's mountain, to receive teaching from the Lord.  And if we think about climbing a mountain, you need your hands!  In this song we have a striking image of not using our hands to climb the mountain.  Our relationship with God is complex.  On one hand we have to climb the mountain ourselves, because of free will God will not force us.  And then on the other hand we have to let God be in control of our climbing, He must help our hands.
This is true love of God, that in serving and worshiping Him we let him guide us.  And the only way to do this is through constant prayer.

I would like to continue to talk about these questions, and the answers, throughout Lent.  As always I pray for you, as I hope you pray for me.

To Be Continued.

Week One: Mexico Mission!

The first week of Mexico has been so blessed.  We had a short term trip with us.  And what I great way to start out the mission! With a renewing of fire and love for Evangelization and the poor.  
During one of my daily prayer times I asked the Lord to give me a verse for my year of missions.  He gave me Psalm 27.   This Psalm is beautiful and speaks to me of no matter what trials come my way, each day I will live for God’s Kingdom.

The Lord is my light and my salvation—

   whom shall I fear?

The Lord is the stronghold of my life—

   of whom shall I be afraid?

When the wicked advance against me

   to devour me,

it is my enemies and my foes

   who will stumble and fall.

Though an army besiege me,

   my heart will not fear;

though war break out against me,

   even then I will be confident.

One thing I ask from the Lord,

   this only do I seek:

that I may dwell in the house of the Lord

   all the days of my life,

to gaze on the beauty of the Lord

   and to seek him in his temple.

For in the day of trouble

   he will keep me safe in his dwelling;

he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent

   and set me high upon a rock.

Then my head will be exalted

   above the enemies who surround me;

at his sacred tent I will sacrifice with shouts of joy;

   I will sing and make music to the Lord.

Hear my voice when I call, Lord;

   be merciful to me and answer me.

My heart says of you, “Seek his face!”

   Your face, Lord, I will seek.

Do not hide your face from me,

   do not turn your servant away in anger;

   you have been my helper.

Do not reject me or forsake me,

   God my Savior.

Though my father and mother forsake me,

   the Lord will receive me.

Teach me your way, Lord;

   lead me in a straight path

   because of my oppressors.

Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,

   for false witnesses rise up against me,

   spouting malicious accusations.

I remain confident of this:

   I will see the goodness of the Lord

   in the land of the living.

Wait for the Lord;

   be strong and take heart

   and wait for the Lord.

Update!

It's not almost the end of Intake and what a crazy time it's been!

This Intake has been the largest Intake FMC has had yet! 

With 13 single girls, 5 guys and 4 families!

Community life has been awesome.

We had an amazing blessed time in Mexico.

And we have 41 missionaries going to 5 mission posts worldwide!

The Lord has blessed me so much. 

God is Good

God is amazingly good to me! The past few weeks have been crazy.  My family has been away from the Philippines for almost three months now, we traveled from the Philippines to our home state of Oregon. There I graduated from High School and traveled back down to Big Woods.  From Big Woods I flew to Ecuador where I spent two weeks helping to lead a mission trip.  It was so amazing! My second favorite country is now Ecuador.  I fell in love with the people, and the beautiful jungle. It was so good to be back in missions serving and preaching.  I will be leading another trip in July.   

Another wonderful thing that happened was I got accepted to this years Intake! 

Every year starting in September, Family Missions Company (FMC) trains new missionaries to go out to the world.  I will be apart of that this year.  I ask for everyone to please please pray for me. That I would have an open heart and mind to be taught. And that God would just shower graces upon me and those joining me in this blessed work. Also pray that I get enough money to pay the training fees. 

I hope and pray that God shows how good he is to you this week!

Update

Today we remember the trial and death of Jesus, who came to earth to die for all of us, for those who know Him today and those who may never know Him.  That thought boggles my mind.  As a Catholic I've always known that he died for my sins, but for the past few weeks I've been reflecting on the fact that he also died for the sins of people who may never know He lived.   It was this thought, and the sadness I felt knowing that people in this world are living and dying without knowing of His mighty love and mercy, that has set a fire in my heart to continue missions apart from my family.
August of this year I'm going to turn 18, and I know there are many options for me to pursue. For about 4 years now I've wanted to get my certification to be a practicing midwife, this is something still on my heart but it doesn't seem as important now.
Many of my friends are going on to college, but that too doesn't seem as important.  What seems most important living a life, and preaching a gospel that will save souls, all with the help of Christ.
So a couple days ago I gave my application to be a full time missionary with FMC. (fmcmissions.com)
My missionary training, called Intake, starts in September.  I ask everyone to pray for me as I prepare for training.

Christmas Day

Last night we went to midnight mass, it was beautiful. We went up to the Benedictine Monastery. Then we came back down and had snacks with our friends and the Alvarez family. This morning we opened up presents and skyped with some family. Today was a crazy day. We went to two birthday parties and also to a Christmas gathering. Having tropical weather and sweating today made it hard to believe it was Christmas. But today was very blessed.   I'm so thankful to be in missions again.








I hope everyone has a wonderful and blessed Christmas,



Abi

Stateside Mission

A week ago today my father, and three of my siblings, and I came back from Joplin MO. We went there to lead a work mission trip.  Six students from New York came down to help work on some projects. I wasn't very excited about going on this trip, I would have much rather stay at home with the rest of my family. But God did amazing things on that trip.  Every night I went to bed sore and aching, and every morning I woke with renewed strength. I made some wonderful friends, and watched the group turn into MISSIONARIES.  Its amazing how close people become when working selflessly side by side for the furthering of the Kingdom.   Being back on the mission field changed my heart. It's amazing how much God has to do that for us. And yet He never stops.
I'm very excited to go on more mission trips this year. :)

God Bless!
Abi

Jesus Fixes you

He does! I remember before I had my reversion I fought with my Mom every single day, sometimes twice or three times a day. It was horrible. I was always angry. And I took it out on my siblings. The end result was all of my siblings basically hated me. I felt awful about it, but it had gotten so bad that they didn't care anymore.

Today I was thinking that, my Mom and I don't argue as much. I mean like never! It is so awesome! And I am steadily patching things up with my siblings. We still fight, but not like we used to. My life is so much happier, I can live my life without the ugly feeling of anger and guilt. Jesus fixes you. I'm not perfect, I still have to work to that. But I am so much better!!

I love you Jesus!!!!

Blessings,

Lizzy

My story

I come from a very strong Catholic family, and I considered myself a strong Catholic too. I prayed with my family and went to mass every Sunday. Then I slowly drifted away. I still continued to go to mass with my family but, I no longer payed attention. I cut myself off form God.
It wasn't until last year that I realized this. All of the sudden I was hopelessly lost. All of my faith had finally left me, and I was scared and angry. There were many nights that I cried myself to sleep because I felt so alone. It's hard to explain what happened in side of my mind. For all of my angry and sadness I crept hidden deep inside, I was afraid that if my parents knew about my struggle I would be forced to learn more about my faith. It wasn't that I didn't want to, I did desperately, but I wanted to do it myself. So in my pride I struggled.
The ability to discern if my actions where right or wrong got harder and harder. Yet still I wanted help myself, God (if he was out there) didn't need to help me, I didn't need him. Finally I gave up. I gave up caring whether I was a good person or not. I just didn't care. Thankfully I didn't see that as a reason to sin more, I just didn't do anything. Good or bad.
Around the same time that I had started to struggle my parents felt the call to missions. I was the only one in the family who was against leaving. But I kept it to myself. In May we moved down to Louisiana, where the mission base is. Still unhappy I started to wonder if I could really help myself. Something started to change in me then, but I didn't do anything.
Why I didn't do anything confuses me, so it will probably sound confusing to you too.
On my top 10 hate list, I absolutely hate hypocrites. So even though I wanted to believe in God, I did not want to be a hypocrite. So I stayed in my land of confused darkness. What finaly made me take that flying leap of faith was not the actual camp but the staff retreat. For Faith Camp I was a part of staff, and a month before all the staff got together.
I was standing in the semi-darkness, it was Praise and Worship time. All the songs seemed to be centered around forgiveness and God's love (imagine that.) All of the sudden I felt pulled to my knees. Down there I finally said it, I said "Jesus I don't care about me any more. I give myself to you. Me, worthless, dirty and sinful. I give you my life, my body and soul."
I said that over and over again, then this wonderful peace came over me. And I was so happy!
It wasn't really Faith Camp that changed me, although Faith Camp has built me up greatly. But if I had not been on staff, I would not be sharing this story with you.

Pics are coming soon!
~Lizzy